I have been grappling with this thought for a while now. However, after many sleepless nights, I thought I should consult you on the problem
My problem in a nutshell: My colleague Natasha (name changed) is extremely lazy regarding work. She is in my team and has been working with me on most projects for a while now. Be it on calls or zoom meetings or some days at work, when we have discussions on the project, I hear her share her fancy ideas and receive appreciation. However, at the end of it, it is always me carrying the entire load and finishing the task. Yet, when the feedback or appreciation is given, I see her lining up the first to take it. I haven’t been able to tell my boss that I feel burdened with the entire task.
What annoys me the most is that she is never interested in the work and is always seen at the office, meeting and joking with someone from another team or over the phone. I want to tell her about her attitude towards work and teamwork has to change, but I don’t want to be curt either. How can I do this effectively? I feel I have been taken for a ride and it isn’t a great feeling. Please help me find a way out of this.
Do advice.
Ms. Fed-up-with-her-teammate
Dear Ms. Fed-Up
The problem you have raised is common nowadays. There are employees like you who often end up working harder because there is a teammate who wouldn’t move a finger. And, it is also understandable that you feel manipulated because you have to share the credit with the person who hasn’t done a fraction of the work. However, amid all the emotions running high in your mind, you should also remember that you shouldn’t react in haste because it may end up offending her, taking away the attention from her behavior.
So, first, you must understand what kind of response do you want from her. Do you want her to understand how you feel and think due to her actions? Do you want her to rectify it?
- Has she been uniform with her performance during recent times? It is important to ask this because if she ended up not contributing at all only in the last few instances, you might want to know why this is happening. Is she not happy with the approach, or does she think she can do other roles in the project?
- For one, complaining and carping about it will not help. Why do you want to take this step? Is it out of irritation or do you want her to understand what she is lacking or doing for her to take corrective measures? Knowing the purpose of taking up this issue with her will help you decide the tone of your conversation.
- Often, we attach reasons and factors for people’s behavior. You might want to find out if Natasha is lazy or not keen on work. Ensure that you ask rather than state what you have observed. Sometimes, you get surprised that some of the reasons we assign to people’s behavior turn out to be untrue.
- Most importantly, see if you can have this conversation with another office friend or colleague being part of it, or if it can be approached independently. If the other colleague can be a moderator and enable a fruitful conversation take them along. Or have this discussion over a cup of tea or coffee at the canteen with her. Ensure you don’t bring unnecessary attention from others at work to your interaction regarding this.
- Also, make the purpose behind this conversation clear in your conversation with her. Do you have a solution? Tell her that you can help her. Do you want to pass it on to her as a mere observation? Say, “Natasha, I have been thinking about discussing this with you since the beginning of this project. I feel you were not interested in it.” Don’t begin the conversation with an accusation; it will immediately make her defensive about it.
- Remember these: Don’t accuse, don’t assign reasons to ask, listen to their answers patiently without interrupting and Offer solutions.
Despite all these efforts, you might not have a great result: Natasha might deny or tell you that she did her best. But always remember, such instances of working with a non-cooperative colleague can also mean an opportunity.
I wanted to share this interesting article with you
It points out that additional responsibilities often also mean that you have the chance to acquire new skills or hone on existing ones. That is the silver lining if you are looking for one.
I hope your conversation with Natasha is fruitful for both of you. Just talk about it with a purpose. Stay calm, stay focused and good luck.
