Circa 2005. I vividly recall a family get-together specially arranged to welcome the latest entrant into our brood – my two-month-old nephew. When we were huddled around him cooing in his ears, a slightly foul smell floated in the air. My cousin (the baby’s dad) swung into action, took the little one aside, deftly cleaned him up, and changed his diaper. A hushed gasp of surprise and appreciation traveled through the entire gathering – I can never forget that. This was probably my family’s first glimpse of a millennial dad – or the modern dad, who shares the parenting load almost equally with his partner.
Since then, I have seen many of my male cousins and friends be hands-on dads. And when our daughter was born in 2018, I saw my husband spend sleepless days and nights, feeding her, burping her, and holding her while she napped. Dads are transforming. Contemporary dads are no longer just breadwinners, spending time with their kids sporadically.
It’s wonderful to witness this change on the home front! But what about workplaces? While organizations are increasingly taking action to make sure working mothers feel supported by offering flexibility, remote working options, childcare support, mental health services, and more, dads have been left to quietly grapple on their own. Ravi*, a dad of a two-year-old, who works in the manufacturing sector, says, “I got just three days off when my daughter was born, and my workdays are long and demanding. I wish I could have spent more time with my daughter in the initial days when my wife was still recovering.”
What can organizations do to help dads reach their full potential at work and at home?
-Offer paternity leave: Paternity leave is still a rarity. To start with, organizations could offer at least a 2-to-4-week break to all new dads. And encourage dads to avail the entire leave – this is equally important. Because thanks to social conditioning, even when companies do offer a paternity break, employees hesitate to avail of it for fear of being seen as lacking in dedication at work. In a recent survey in the US, 62% of working dads admitted that there was an ‘unspoken’ rule that dads must not take full paternity leave. So, go the extra mile and push your employees to take time off when they become dads.
-Embrace flexibility: Flexibility is a lifeline for every working mom. It is the same for dads. Flexibility is not a favor or a reward that companies provide to their employees. It has multiple benefits for any organization – it boosts retention, attracts top talent, and increases productivity.
-Provide childcare support: According to a 2022 Mckinsey report on how companies can ease working parents’ return to the office, the number one reason for women leaving the workforce is the unavailability of reliable childcare options. So, on-site childcare facilities or even subsidized childcare options, or after-school tutoring services can help working parents immensely.
-Create a culture of kindness and openness: Encourage employees to open up about their challenges. Let dads bond with each other and voice out their struggles. Set up inclusion committees that are responsible for making every employee feel heard and valued. Provide unconscious bias training to employees and tackle micro-aggression. Not least of all, reward kindness.
The above initiatives will help dads thrive not just at home, but at work too. And they will not only help dads but in turn, moms too. Anvitha*, a mom of a seven-month-old, says, “The organization my husband works for offers four months of paternity leave, and my husband availed the entire leave. What a blessing it was! It gave him time to bond with our son and has made my re-entry into work very smooth.”
A testimony to how companies are recognizing the need for paternity leave in their policies is evident in the results of the 2022 ‘Best Companies for Women in India’, an annual gender analytics by Avtar and Seramount. The study has found that among the Top 100 ‘BEST’ companies, the average duration of fully paid paternity leave has increased from 7 days in 2016 to 18 days now.
These measures can go a long way in helping families thrive. But remember, while they can certainly help move the needle, there’s something else that can do wonders, which is embracing a complete shift in mindset where everyone unlearns societal rules.
(*Names changed to protect identity)
